Online dating why it fails
Anonymous Woman (AW): I can’t remember the exact year I signed up… Actually, now that I think about it, that was how most of the messages I got started.
By the time of this interview, she had already given up and moved on, finally discovering her future husband while visiting old friends at her alma mater. Ryan (RD): What year did you sign up with an online dating website and how long did you keep your account? RD: What were the majority of messages that you received from guys like? I got some commenting on my picture telling me how “hot” I was…how “good” I looked.The lesson to all of you younger readers: take your love life seriously when you turn 30, instead of waiting until you’re 35 or 40. I do know when I was in my early 30’s, anyone in their 40’s seemed old to me! It’s been my experience that I seem to get alot of emails from the 50 and over crowd. Okay, it’s time to have an open and frank discussion about the battle of the sexes and the dating game.It’s far too complex, scary and difficult for mere mortals – so let’s bridge the gap by asking both men and women what doesn’t work when it comes to online dating Dating has gone digital.Once considered a realm inhabited only by the socially awkward, online dating is now just another tool in the toolbox, no matter whether you’re looking for a hook-up or your soulmate.....Thus, their target market remains women, 27-34 – who may not be ready to settle down quite yet.
These women still have money to make, places to travel and oats to sow.
I find the latter hard to believe, but find this mantra in every profile of every professional woman online. What you’re missing is that what you want has absolutely no relation to what women want. The problem is that many women from 27-34 are independent professionals just like their male peers.
Any advice on how to navigate these new paradigms in the dating world? And to directly address your email, I have to divide my response into two different parts: 1) What You’re Getting Right and 2) What You’re Missing. We’ve addressed this before, from an older man who couldn’t possibly fathom why a younger woman wouldn’t want to be with him. We can complain that the opposite sex is unrealistic and passing up great opportunities – and we’d be right – but it doesn’t change that people want what they want. They, too, have a lot of dating options, are busy building their careers, and don’t have a clear urgency to settle down. Theoretically, this is when want to have time before becoming dads.
That was one of the main reasons I called it quits.
It made me SO uncomfortable that guys so much older than me, older than most of my siblings (all of which are 8 years plus older than me), were sending me messages telling me that I was “hot”.
I have tried a combination of online dating, speed dating, professional singles events, volunteering, happy hours etc. I thought that online dating would be great since you are essentially pre-screening people for dates.